I am Because We are

Good thing I am trying to follow the spirit of Lent more than the law of Lent because I completely failed blogging every day this week. Oops. Hey, life happens.

I have reached the halfway point in my JVC experience and that in turn has made me reflect on why I am here. Why am I doing what I am doing where I am doing it? I do not think I will know the actual answer to these questions this year, or for many years, or perhaps ever. However, I do know that a desire to be in community played a significant role in my choice to do a service year. Two years ago this spring, I was preparing to study abroad in Zambia. There is a saying in Africa that translates to "I am because we are and we are because I am." This idiom speaks to the heart of what it means to be community. We are all interconnected. Humanity draws strength and creativity from humanity. This in turn fosters the ability to be a unique individual and contribute something essential to the community. We all need each other.

Nine out of ten Gonzaga students (yes, I just made up that statistic but I guarantee you that the actual number is very close to this) when asked what they love most about my alma mater will say community, myself included. Part of why I joined JVC was because my college experience showed me how important it is for me to be in meaningful relationships with those around me. My time on the East Coast has been defined by these relationships.

Yesterday, I spent my Friday off with my roommate Marlena at her placement. Mar works as an after-school coordinator at an inner-city charter school in SE DC. She is in charge of 100ish kindergarten through third grade students plus staff. Marlena's work environment is nearly a complete opposite of mine. At Joseph's House, I work with adults and though it can get busy, my work practically drips with the quiet of peaceful afternoons, soothing voices, and gentle touches. On Friday I found myself surrounded by kids and noise seemed to come from every corner. No one was meditating or taking mindful breaths. Everything was chaos and fast and full of an energy that I am not used to.

Yet in the midst of a place that is not my place, there was community. Marlena, who is nearly six feet tall and has extremely blonde hair, had told her students that she was bringing her sister, me, to work. When I walked in, her students started jumping from excitement. In the time it took me to blink, I had second and third graders hanging off my arms. I was Marlena's sister and since they loved her they automatically loved me. It did not matter that I looked more like the black students than I did my Italian roommate. I was family and I was there and that was all that mattered.

Community holds us together. On Thursday night, I stayed at work late to sit with Mama as she was beginning her long process of dying. That morning, after many days of being together, she had looked at me and had not known who I was. I had to walk away to keep from crying in front of her. And just as quickly as I had been hurt, I returned to her side. She is my community. Part of my identity is shaped by her and I needed to fulfill the part of her that is shaped by me even in those final moments when she was going in and out of lucidity. Mama passed away this morning, peacefully and in a community that loved her.

Community, even on the days that are challenging and annoying, is a blessing. It is an awesome thing to be able to share life together. Who are those people that have and continue to shape who you are? Where is your community? Thank them, even if in the moment the process hurt you. For some reason, that made you stronger, wiser, more human. And in turn, your life shaped them, too.

I am because we are. We are because I am.